Sunday evening and I step out of the house to see off some lady friends who had come over to dinner at my place.The usual chit chat as happens with ladies gets us standing at the bus stop a while as we exchange final stories about our kids, life, stuff ladies talk about.
Right across where we stand is a car packed. We do not notice it until a young girl comes out of it.She looks unhurried as she proceeds to wait outside the car. What happens next manages to stop us talking about stuff and change our focus. Next steps out an old man. I mean, he is old enough to be the girls grandfather. He has a word with a watchman and walks right across the road to a chemist. We can only guess what he is gone to purchase. On his way to the chemist he passes right where my three friends and I are standing. He is old with falling hair.
We decide to watch the unfolding scenario for a while. The old guy spends a while at the chemist and his lady friend calls him on her mobile. Perhaps she feels he is taking too long there. But he is old and all his actions are slow. After a while he steps out, accompanies his lady friend across the road to some rooms right right above a pub.
As we stand there trying to let it all sink in, we notice 3 even younger girls. These surely must be primary school kids. They are dressed up in ways to appear older than they really are. They walk right past where we stand and a little way up the road a car stops. The three girls stop to talk to the occupants and that goes on for a while. Eventually, one of them get into the car and the other two walk on.
We are all silent now. Trying to come to terms with what is happening right before our eyes. Just then a motorbike passes by. Atop are a young guy and girl. We are shocked to see what is happening even as they ride past us. He has his hands all over her and she does not seem to mind.
Eventually we have to leave. Not many words are exchanged between us as we bid each other goodbye. I walk back to my house. I cannot begin to comprehend what I have just seen. Why would a young girl get involved with such an old man? Even if for cash, how can anything happen between them? How does she live with herself after tonight? What is that old man thinking? Just how far are people willing to go for cash?
It is a pathetic scenario, the way we have gone in our morals as a society. It begs an urgent call for change if we have to save a generation that seems so bent on self destruct that they do not seem to think about tomorrow. But even as I think of those gullible young girls, I wonder, who are those mature men who go sleeping around with them? Do they have kids of their own? If so, how would they feel if something like that happened to their own?
It is scary when we live in a society that it is every man for himself and God for us all. We need to be able to speak out about the moral decay in our society because none of us is safe in the scenario. This is where our own kids are growing up, who knows who they look up to?
I think about this long school holiday. Some kids have just cleared form four and feel like the own the world. They will litter the streets doing all sorts of crazy stuff. I have seen them drunk, smoking God-knows-what as they walk around late at night from some crazed up hangouts. They engage in all sorts of stuff without the knowledge of their parents. Sometimes parents can do little even when they know of these activities. It seems to me that our young people have taken their parents and society hostage. They do all they wan to do as we stand aside and watch, helpless to take any action.
01 December 2013
21 November 2013
My season has changed.
Finally I have done it. I am my own person now. I welcome any challenges that will come with establishing my identity while doing something that I love doing most. Writing. The excitement will not let me sleep. I am loosing sleep because I have work to do. Work that I love so much. Doing a good job to ensure satisfied Clients on the other end.
I have quite a number now. But one of them stands out. He is fun and communicates mainly with emoticons. Makes me loosen up around him. This is a whole new world to me. One of ultimate professionalism. I am glad that I can now make use of all the lessons I have learnt on customer satisfaction to date. At my own pace and time. So help me God!
I have quite a number now. But one of them stands out. He is fun and communicates mainly with emoticons. Makes me loosen up around him. This is a whole new world to me. One of ultimate professionalism. I am glad that I can now make use of all the lessons I have learnt on customer satisfaction to date. At my own pace and time. So help me God!
28 October 2013
How cheap can sex get?
It is everywhere now. If you want to make a sale of anything just get an almost nude lady to pose in an ad and watch the open-eyed client troop to have a go at your product. That sex sells is an understatement. Sex peddles and fast.
Marketing firms are making a kill luring clients with almost naked models advertising their services. Many people are lured to the product by the almost nude models who serve to lure them to have a go at it.
Many view such advertising as harmless and argue that it is a case of getting attention to the product. What most people do not pose to ask themselves is what happens when all around us are insinuations towards sex that even our children are seeing all around? How are we as parents going to teach our children about the sanctity of sex while all around them they are getting the message that to sell anything it has to be packaged as alluring and come oozing with sexual energy to be relevant?
It is no wonder that we have cheapened sex so much that those who choose to stick to the Christian way of sanctity and faithfulness to one partner are regarded as oblivious to the God-given power to achieve all that they need in life. Where this leaves us is at a point that our young people are growing up with the knowledge that they can make it anywhere in life without hard work but by virtue of their sex allure.
Ideally, sex should only happen between two people who are committed to one another preferably in a marriage but this is not the situation on the ground. What we are seeing instead is so much cheap sex being passed around usually for all the wrong reasons. So if a young girl wants to climb the corporate ladder all she needs to do is find a man who will propel her up in exchange for a romp in the hay. And the young man is not left behind either. What with older women who are all too willing to exploit him sexually in exchange for cash.
As a society we have it all wrong. The message we need to preach to our young people (and ourselves) is that sex is not meant to be something cheap rather that God meant it as a way of procreation between two married people who are ready to deal with all the consequences. Yes sex does have strings attached which is one thing no one talks about. When you sleep with a person for cash or any other material gain you are cheapening it so much so that you eventually lose the real meaning of it.
It is no wonder that so many people now have lost all value of marriage. Why bother when you can buy sex when you need it without any commitment whatsoever! What we are looking at in the long run is a situation where people have lost the real meaning of being committed to another person, dealing with any conflict therein and still staying together by working at it.
Cheap sex has contaminated the way many people view it and has left a huge dent in the minds of many on their view of it. Sex is not a short romp in the hay between two hurried people with no obligation but real sex should happen only between two mature people who are willing to commit and use it as a way to strengthen the bond and keep the flame of their love alight. That is the way God meant it to be and anything short of it will come with dire consequences in the long run.
It is everywhere now. If you want to make a sale of anything just get an almost nude lady to pose in an ad and watch the open-eyed client troop to have a go at your product. That sex sells is an understatement. Sex peddles and fast.
Marketing firms are making a kill luring clients with almost naked models advertising their services. Many people are lured to the product by the almost nude models who serve to lure them to have a go at it.
Many view such advertising as harmless and argue that it is a case of getting attention to the product. What most people do not pose to ask themselves is what happens when all around us are insinuations towards sex that even our children are seeing all around? How are we as parents going to teach our children about the sanctity of sex while all around them they are getting the message that to sell anything it has to be packaged as alluring and come oozing with sexual energy to be relevant?
It is no wonder that we have cheapened sex so much that those who choose to stick to the Christian way of sanctity and faithfulness to one partner are regarded as oblivious to the God-given power to achieve all that they need in life. Where this leaves us is at a point that our young people are growing up with the knowledge that they can make it anywhere in life without hard work but by virtue of their sex allure.
Ideally, sex should only happen between two people who are committed to one another preferably in a marriage but this is not the situation on the ground. What we are seeing instead is so much cheap sex being passed around usually for all the wrong reasons. So if a young girl wants to climb the corporate ladder all she needs to do is find a man who will propel her up in exchange for a romp in the hay. And the young man is not left behind either. What with older women who are all too willing to exploit him sexually in exchange for cash.
As a society we have it all wrong. The message we need to preach to our young people (and ourselves) is that sex is not meant to be something cheap rather that God meant it as a way of procreation between two married people who are ready to deal with all the consequences. Yes sex does have strings attached which is one thing no one talks about. When you sleep with a person for cash or any other material gain you are cheapening it so much so that you eventually lose the real meaning of it.
It is no wonder that so many people now have lost all value of marriage. Why bother when you can buy sex when you need it without any commitment whatsoever! What we are looking at in the long run is a situation where people have lost the real meaning of being committed to another person, dealing with any conflict therein and still staying together by working at it.
Cheap sex has contaminated the way many people view it and has left a huge dent in the minds of many on their view of it. Sex is not a short romp in the hay between two hurried people with no obligation but real sex should happen only between two mature people who are willing to commit and use it as a way to strengthen the bond and keep the flame of their love alight. That is the way God meant it to be and anything short of it will come with dire consequences in the long run.
25 October 2013
19 September 2013
The cost of compromise
Many Christians are living compromising lives. They are faithful in their church attendance, very open handed in giving and have a real strong connection with their faith. The attempt to lead a victorious Christian life is there yet they still miss out on the full benefits in their Christian walk because somewhere along the way they have compromised.
It comes in many ways but I speak of the most common ones that I see. The impression about a person is made even before they speak a word. Once you meet a person, a mental image of them is made in the mind. This is influenced by the way that person carries themselves. The way they dress and their mannerisms often are the first things that strike us about a person. Therefore, even before you strike a conversation your mind will have registered an impression of the kind of a person they are.
As Christians we are called to be different as representatives of Christ. When folks encounter us they should see one fit to carry the message of salvation to the world. The way we carry ourselves should make it easy to reach out to all persons with the love of Christ. Notice how easy it is to be open to a nurse in the hospital. The white starched uniform shows professionalism and it is easy to spot a person wearing white thus reach out for help. In the same way, the way a Christian gears should allow the person to be approachable since people are drawn to those who they find accommodating.
The way a Christian deals with the challenges of life is quite telling of the level of his faith. Since those around us notice our reactions to somewhat challenging situations, Christians need to model their faith in God by allowing him in whatever it is that might come their way. People need to see the calmness in having the master of the universe take control of the situations in our lives. This in itself is a testimony that we know just who it is that controls our lives.
Often times I have heard words come out of a person’s mouth that do not quite fit in with my perception of him. As Christians we need to ensure that what we say is meant to uplift a fellow person and not to tear them down. As ambassadors of Christ we need to dwell on good thoughts and allow only positive words to come forth from us. This way we shall be in a good place to offer comfort and even draw others to Christ by representing him well with our words.
On the other hand, when Christians live lives that are no different from others there is so much at stake. Since evidently no one will want to emulate a person who does not live what they say, many souls that might have been worn to Christ will be lost. Our sole reason for being here on earth being to live lives in a way behest with the Character of Christ then failure to do so will defeat our very purpose in life.
Let us all endeavor to represent Christ in all that we do. Once we saturate ourselves with his word then all that we are and do will tell of the love of our master. In return people will seek to know him having had a taste of his loving kindness from their encounter with us. Do you love Jesus? Go on, represent Christ today. You might be the only one who matters!
23 August 2013
Teenagers, dont I just love mine!
After many years trying to find a way of dealing with my teenage daughter, I believe I have a minefield of tips on how to live with this somewhat troublesome age. The knowledge has come from many teeth gnashing hair pulling episodes as a result of dealing with someone who feels that they know everything they should about life yet with no idea how to get off the couch and stretch an arm doing something useful.
After giving numerous lectures on the do’s and don’ts of life to one whose attention couldn’t be further than her nose I have had to learn (from her) of new ways to deal with her. Most of the time it seemed to me that I was talking to myself whereas I thought I was imparting valuable advice to a gullible youth (or so I thought). Having to compete with an ally of items for my teenager’s attention has taught me patience I never thought I might have in this lifetime.
Take earphones for instance. I wonder if whoever invented these knows (or even thought) of a poor mother, desperately trying to get through to her teenager with efforts thwarted by some obnoxious earplugs meant to blank out her voice to the wearer. I have, not once, taken comfort in knowing that I am not alone in the war after seeing some youth wearing huge headphones that are meant for the music industry (or something more serious) as they walk past moving to some rhythm only audible to themselves.
The earphones are nothing in the list of evil in comparison to the loud music (boy, I wonder how my eardrums could have taken this) coming from my teenagers room. Many of the times I have had to develop a contour (or two) in the face in an effort to pass across my dismay at the volume and the constant rattling of window panes that only served to make my teenager look up humorously for a split second when I get in her view.
And who does not know that teenagers are food tanks as well? How in the world does a sleeping Child(teenager), tired from watching too many movies while lying on the floor in her room, find the strength to get up in the middle of the night to go get a (countless) helping of food, without falling over something in the dark? At some point I was convinced that my house had turned into a competition ground for hungry teenagers to come and compete (of course in my absence) at who could take in more volumes of grub! Not to mention the ensuing mess after the visits!
Eye rolling. When it started, I kept thinking she could not keep it up for long but God, talk of energy! Communication of disdain has never been easier than on a teenager’s face. I could walk into her bedroom while she was doing something useful (only to herself) and she would practically roll her eyes in a way that said loudly `duuuh mum, cannot a girl get time to herself’. Having to stand my ground (though it would have been easier to back off running) I would remain in an attempt to make sure that her blood circulation kept going by asking her to at least get up and clean up her room.
Amidst all the clamor of trying to instill the right behavior into one who seemed bent on frustrating my efforts even before I begun, I came to my senses. A mother to a teen has to learn some battle tactics to employ if they have to keep her child (mine really?) under control. And right there I got a plan. No longer would I have a permanent headache (constantly asking her to pass over painkillers in hope her conscience might be pricked and she might change and spare me the headaches) but would be well prepared to join my girl in her game. Thanks to invaluable resources (The war at home tv series) I could now take on the culprit right in her style!
What glee! Nothing beats a TMAW (Teenage Mother At War) than the perturbed look on the face of her teenager on realizing that her game is over. It started with laziness (learned laziness). It would be a weekend and instead of getting up early to prepare breakfast for an unresponsive-until-after ten teenager, I would sleep in myself! And by that I mean sleep in till after 11. On the day that begun I got the honor of being shaken awake (after I’d ignored the vibrating phone) and asked when I thought breakfast would be served! The nerve of it! No inquiry if I might have been unwell. Then alas, minutes later I got to hear her moving around in the kitchen and was Blessed with some wonderful smell of cooking coming from there.
Right then a resolve was born! I was no longer going to be anyone’s slave (of course I still am in some way) but if anyone needed something done in the house they would have to do it themselves. Anyone in this case means my teen. And so I launched into battle. Sitting room was filthy and my friends are coming to visit, mum? Go fix it yourself. All the dishes are dirty, how do I perfect my newly discovered art of cooking? Clean them first. I need to go out with my friends to the mall (wearing high heels and pretending to be shopping for apartments). Wash (brush and water) the carpets and you might earn some cash.
Slowly it dawned on me that all the time I had spent fighting with my teenager would have turned out differently if I had learnt early enough to get into her shoes and wear them. The world became so much easier for me to live in from that day I stopped fighting her and decided to join her. No longer would I stop my friends coming over for tea (fear of embarrassing my teenager who thought our talk was too old fashioned) but would invite them over and talk and laugh deep into the evening with complete disregard of any obligations!
I discovered that I could take longer in the bathroom (me time) and completely blank out any insistent knocking. That meals did not need to be served on time (no one would die anyway) and that God does not necessarily call mothers to be chefs all their lives! And since toilet cleaning was not innate, why not let my teenager learn to do it herself? I also discovered that a mother is a flexible being who can learn (even do better) a few tasks like rolling of eyes (in communication to my teen). Given, I now once in a while get hit by a wave of sympathy on seeing the resigned look on her face when (yet again) I beat her to her game but the memories of those past days when I was imprisoned, chained to trying to get through to my girl in vain are a constant reminder that the battle continues. Aluta Continua!
After giving numerous lectures on the do’s and don’ts of life to one whose attention couldn’t be further than her nose I have had to learn (from her) of new ways to deal with her. Most of the time it seemed to me that I was talking to myself whereas I thought I was imparting valuable advice to a gullible youth (or so I thought). Having to compete with an ally of items for my teenager’s attention has taught me patience I never thought I might have in this lifetime.
Take earphones for instance. I wonder if whoever invented these knows (or even thought) of a poor mother, desperately trying to get through to her teenager with efforts thwarted by some obnoxious earplugs meant to blank out her voice to the wearer. I have, not once, taken comfort in knowing that I am not alone in the war after seeing some youth wearing huge headphones that are meant for the music industry (or something more serious) as they walk past moving to some rhythm only audible to themselves.
The earphones are nothing in the list of evil in comparison to the loud music (boy, I wonder how my eardrums could have taken this) coming from my teenagers room. Many of the times I have had to develop a contour (or two) in the face in an effort to pass across my dismay at the volume and the constant rattling of window panes that only served to make my teenager look up humorously for a split second when I get in her view.
And who does not know that teenagers are food tanks as well? How in the world does a sleeping Child(teenager), tired from watching too many movies while lying on the floor in her room, find the strength to get up in the middle of the night to go get a (countless) helping of food, without falling over something in the dark? At some point I was convinced that my house had turned into a competition ground for hungry teenagers to come and compete (of course in my absence) at who could take in more volumes of grub! Not to mention the ensuing mess after the visits!
Eye rolling. When it started, I kept thinking she could not keep it up for long but God, talk of energy! Communication of disdain has never been easier than on a teenager’s face. I could walk into her bedroom while she was doing something useful (only to herself) and she would practically roll her eyes in a way that said loudly `duuuh mum, cannot a girl get time to herself’. Having to stand my ground (though it would have been easier to back off running) I would remain in an attempt to make sure that her blood circulation kept going by asking her to at least get up and clean up her room.
Amidst all the clamor of trying to instill the right behavior into one who seemed bent on frustrating my efforts even before I begun, I came to my senses. A mother to a teen has to learn some battle tactics to employ if they have to keep her child (mine really?) under control. And right there I got a plan. No longer would I have a permanent headache (constantly asking her to pass over painkillers in hope her conscience might be pricked and she might change and spare me the headaches) but would be well prepared to join my girl in her game. Thanks to invaluable resources (The war at home tv series) I could now take on the culprit right in her style!
What glee! Nothing beats a TMAW (Teenage Mother At War) than the perturbed look on the face of her teenager on realizing that her game is over. It started with laziness (learned laziness). It would be a weekend and instead of getting up early to prepare breakfast for an unresponsive-until-after ten teenager, I would sleep in myself! And by that I mean sleep in till after 11. On the day that begun I got the honor of being shaken awake (after I’d ignored the vibrating phone) and asked when I thought breakfast would be served! The nerve of it! No inquiry if I might have been unwell. Then alas, minutes later I got to hear her moving around in the kitchen and was Blessed with some wonderful smell of cooking coming from there.
Right then a resolve was born! I was no longer going to be anyone’s slave (of course I still am in some way) but if anyone needed something done in the house they would have to do it themselves. Anyone in this case means my teen. And so I launched into battle. Sitting room was filthy and my friends are coming to visit, mum? Go fix it yourself. All the dishes are dirty, how do I perfect my newly discovered art of cooking? Clean them first. I need to go out with my friends to the mall (wearing high heels and pretending to be shopping for apartments). Wash (brush and water) the carpets and you might earn some cash.
Slowly it dawned on me that all the time I had spent fighting with my teenager would have turned out differently if I had learnt early enough to get into her shoes and wear them. The world became so much easier for me to live in from that day I stopped fighting her and decided to join her. No longer would I stop my friends coming over for tea (fear of embarrassing my teenager who thought our talk was too old fashioned) but would invite them over and talk and laugh deep into the evening with complete disregard of any obligations!
I discovered that I could take longer in the bathroom (me time) and completely blank out any insistent knocking. That meals did not need to be served on time (no one would die anyway) and that God does not necessarily call mothers to be chefs all their lives! And since toilet cleaning was not innate, why not let my teenager learn to do it herself? I also discovered that a mother is a flexible being who can learn (even do better) a few tasks like rolling of eyes (in communication to my teen). Given, I now once in a while get hit by a wave of sympathy on seeing the resigned look on her face when (yet again) I beat her to her game but the memories of those past days when I was imprisoned, chained to trying to get through to my girl in vain are a constant reminder that the battle continues. Aluta Continua!
16 August 2013
When the sun shines no more
At times along the path of life we encounter dark days. Days that are so dark that it seems the sun will shine no more. We grapple in the dark trying to find something to hold on to with no success. We turn to those around us that we consider close to us but they offer no solace either. Such is a good time to turn it all to God. Because where man falls short God takes up and completes.
It might be a mother with a sick child who has constantly pleaded for the child's healing on her knees. She has done all she could do for the child but nothing seems to change. She has cried out to God more times than she knows but yet the condition remains the same.
It could be a man who haplessly watches his marriage fall apart as a result of unresolved issues with his wife. He wonders about the fate of his children if a divorce should happen. Knowing too well the impact that would have on the little ones is what breaks his heart over and over again.
Or it is that one who has just found out about a serious health condition. The blow seems irreparable since the news are so fresh. He wonders how to tell his family and about the effects of the sickness on them.
God specialises in turning around such seemingly hopeless situations. It is when we have come to the end of ourselves that God steps in and takes control of the situation. In all his mighty power God comes in and deals with the situation in such a way that leaves no doubt of his presence in our lives. God delights in taking up the difficult situations in our lives for the Glory of his name. It is his way of proving that in this day and age he is still God.
He calls out to you to take your burdens to him. He understands your pain and will make it bearable if only you take it to him in prayer. He is reaching out to you to offload your worries, that thing that is beyond you to him. He is able to deal with it and bring victory in ways you do not know or imagine. And yet all it takes is your faith and that one important step of faith to get him working out things for you.
Trust God with your burden. It is his speciality.Then sit back and watch him at work in your life.
It might be a mother with a sick child who has constantly pleaded for the child's healing on her knees. She has done all she could do for the child but nothing seems to change. She has cried out to God more times than she knows but yet the condition remains the same.
It could be a man who haplessly watches his marriage fall apart as a result of unresolved issues with his wife. He wonders about the fate of his children if a divorce should happen. Knowing too well the impact that would have on the little ones is what breaks his heart over and over again.
Or it is that one who has just found out about a serious health condition. The blow seems irreparable since the news are so fresh. He wonders how to tell his family and about the effects of the sickness on them.
God specialises in turning around such seemingly hopeless situations. It is when we have come to the end of ourselves that God steps in and takes control of the situation. In all his mighty power God comes in and deals with the situation in such a way that leaves no doubt of his presence in our lives. God delights in taking up the difficult situations in our lives for the Glory of his name. It is his way of proving that in this day and age he is still God.
He calls out to you to take your burdens to him. He understands your pain and will make it bearable if only you take it to him in prayer. He is reaching out to you to offload your worries, that thing that is beyond you to him. He is able to deal with it and bring victory in ways you do not know or imagine. And yet all it takes is your faith and that one important step of faith to get him working out things for you.
Trust God with your burden. It is his speciality.Then sit back and watch him at work in your life.
10 August 2013
Secret Longings
They flash across the heart
too sacred to be shared
things that leave my heart
singing with longing.
Noone must know
It must remain a secret
the mystery might be lost
from letting in another.
The beauty of it all
is in the shroud that surrounds
the very secret nature
of these thoughts in me.
Thank God for the mind
it can take us to places unknown before
and swiftly bring us back
where we safely belong.
too sacred to be shared
things that leave my heart
singing with longing.
Noone must know
It must remain a secret
the mystery might be lost
from letting in another.
The beauty of it all
is in the shroud that surrounds
the very secret nature
of these thoughts in me.
Thank God for the mind
it can take us to places unknown before
and swiftly bring us back
where we safely belong.
06 June 2013
God's favor doses
God has been sending doses of favor my way lately. He has been surprising me when I needed it most. Which has been often lately. God has surprised me by revealing to me that it is the small things that matter most. Perhaps his way of telling me to let go of the big stuff and enjoy the seemingly usual stuff in my life.Like the new neighbor's little boy next door.
He is just about 2 years of age. He is a chubby little fella who takes pleasure in running up to me every day when I get home and giving me a bearhug. Most often I have to lift him up and with my kids all grown I had forgotten how it feels to cuddle a little one who fits in perfectly in my arms( and likes it). And so it is a custom I now look forward to every evening that the little boy will stop playing with the others once I get home and come running to hug me.
I am getting used to having a little person trailing me in the house thus. Trying to decipher his needs because he does not speak audibly is also becoming part of the deal. And so most evenings and weekends when I am home I can be found tying up little shoe laces once my little friend decides to leave to his house next door or talking (seemingly to myself) to him with no response expected.
This little boy has brought joy in my life. It is amazing that he often visits my house and leaves me more happy and refreshed from his little presence. I find myself enjoying doing stuff for him because he is so accomodating and deserving of my attention. And in so doing i get so much joy. I call him God's little dose because when he is around he lifts my spirit in an exceptional way.
Then there is my cabbie. There is nothing as refreshing as having a reliable cabbie. This one is always available any time of day or night. One who goes an extra mile at his job. I have known him over an year now and cabbie is a blessing to me and my family. Doesnt talk much but he will take us where we want to go. He is the kind that I can entrust to drive my children somewhere without me.
I have learned a lot lately about things that I often take for granted and what they mean to me. Good health and shelter. Most times i am trusting God for some big things, stuff that could turn my life around but latelly he is sending his love in little doses. He is showing me love in places that I have not been looking. In ways that I often take for granted. I am enjoying his new style. In the meantime I am busy appreciating the love he sends my way.
He is just about 2 years of age. He is a chubby little fella who takes pleasure in running up to me every day when I get home and giving me a bearhug. Most often I have to lift him up and with my kids all grown I had forgotten how it feels to cuddle a little one who fits in perfectly in my arms( and likes it). And so it is a custom I now look forward to every evening that the little boy will stop playing with the others once I get home and come running to hug me.
I am getting used to having a little person trailing me in the house thus. Trying to decipher his needs because he does not speak audibly is also becoming part of the deal. And so most evenings and weekends when I am home I can be found tying up little shoe laces once my little friend decides to leave to his house next door or talking (seemingly to myself) to him with no response expected.
This little boy has brought joy in my life. It is amazing that he often visits my house and leaves me more happy and refreshed from his little presence. I find myself enjoying doing stuff for him because he is so accomodating and deserving of my attention. And in so doing i get so much joy. I call him God's little dose because when he is around he lifts my spirit in an exceptional way.
Then there is my cabbie. There is nothing as refreshing as having a reliable cabbie. This one is always available any time of day or night. One who goes an extra mile at his job. I have known him over an year now and cabbie is a blessing to me and my family. Doesnt talk much but he will take us where we want to go. He is the kind that I can entrust to drive my children somewhere without me.
I have learned a lot lately about things that I often take for granted and what they mean to me. Good health and shelter. Most times i am trusting God for some big things, stuff that could turn my life around but latelly he is sending his love in little doses. He is showing me love in places that I have not been looking. In ways that I often take for granted. I am enjoying his new style. In the meantime I am busy appreciating the love he sends my way.
18 April 2013
Gizmos
She gets out a flashy phone and starts texting and chatting with her friends. Every so often she laughs out loudly at some joke only known to her. Her face is a variety of emotions passed on by the people she chats with. One moment she looks almost ready to cry and I can only imagine she is chatting to someone who is not so happy. Then she bursts out laughing and I get confused.
My ride from town is made interesting sitting next to this young lady in the matatu. She seems to be in a world of her own, only looking up from her phone briefly when paying fare. Otherwise the whole journey home is punctuated with giggles and all manner of expressions as she exchanges all manner of info on her phone. Her speed on the Qwerty phone is somewhat enviable. She sends out endless chats as she switches from one account to another. She seems so engrossed in her world I dare not interfere.
I think about her long after the matatu ride. It concerns me because hers is not an isolated case. I see it all around me, young people who take up any available opportunity to communicate on their phones. As much as I have nothing against the use of the mobile phone it is the seeming addiction to it that bothers me. It seems young people are talking more to their phones than to other people.
When all is said and done we still need to talk to one another on a personal level. But that is changing fast with the elevated use of technology. Nothing wrong with using it to improve our lives but what concerns me is the fact that the warmth of one on one communication is fast getting extinct. It is possible to express my feelings over a chat or sms but miss out on the physical touch that is present in a face to face chat. I cannot dismiss those valuable clues and hints i get when chatting with people, the warmth of having someone's feelings flash across their face as we talk.
At times it makes sense to put all those devices down and stare out of the window of a moving vehicle instead of being immersed with the phone. When home it also makes sense that you bond as a family during those lively chats after dinner. Nothing can replace the warm laughter of family members who have come to an end of the day and gather together to share their experiences. It is the very essence of bonding.
But young people never ever fall shot of amazing habits. I have witnessed young men who sit in a shared public seat like they are the only ones aboard. This leaves the other person dangling onto the little space left for them as the man taps away on his phone. I often wonder if such a person who is so engrossed in himself can have a healthy sharing relationship. Some habits are very telling, you know.
That said, there needs to be a balance in life so that we do not loose touch of the important things in life while chasing after what's new and seems appealing to us. Those phones and gadgets should not take the place of healthy communication. When not regulated these gizmos serve to break down the very fabric of relationships which is healthy talking with whole hearted attention given one to another. Otherwise we risk loosing out on the very things that make us human beings with all emotions to show for it.
My ride from town is made interesting sitting next to this young lady in the matatu. She seems to be in a world of her own, only looking up from her phone briefly when paying fare. Otherwise the whole journey home is punctuated with giggles and all manner of expressions as she exchanges all manner of info on her phone. Her speed on the Qwerty phone is somewhat enviable. She sends out endless chats as she switches from one account to another. She seems so engrossed in her world I dare not interfere.
I think about her long after the matatu ride. It concerns me because hers is not an isolated case. I see it all around me, young people who take up any available opportunity to communicate on their phones. As much as I have nothing against the use of the mobile phone it is the seeming addiction to it that bothers me. It seems young people are talking more to their phones than to other people.
When all is said and done we still need to talk to one another on a personal level. But that is changing fast with the elevated use of technology. Nothing wrong with using it to improve our lives but what concerns me is the fact that the warmth of one on one communication is fast getting extinct. It is possible to express my feelings over a chat or sms but miss out on the physical touch that is present in a face to face chat. I cannot dismiss those valuable clues and hints i get when chatting with people, the warmth of having someone's feelings flash across their face as we talk.
At times it makes sense to put all those devices down and stare out of the window of a moving vehicle instead of being immersed with the phone. When home it also makes sense that you bond as a family during those lively chats after dinner. Nothing can replace the warm laughter of family members who have come to an end of the day and gather together to share their experiences. It is the very essence of bonding.
But young people never ever fall shot of amazing habits. I have witnessed young men who sit in a shared public seat like they are the only ones aboard. This leaves the other person dangling onto the little space left for them as the man taps away on his phone. I often wonder if such a person who is so engrossed in himself can have a healthy sharing relationship. Some habits are very telling, you know.
That said, there needs to be a balance in life so that we do not loose touch of the important things in life while chasing after what's new and seems appealing to us. Those phones and gadgets should not take the place of healthy communication. When not regulated these gizmos serve to break down the very fabric of relationships which is healthy talking with whole hearted attention given one to another. Otherwise we risk loosing out on the very things that make us human beings with all emotions to show for it.
25 March 2013
An Alcoholic Generation?
Yesterday I happened out just after 9pm and what I saw broke my heart. While stepping out of a chemist where I had gone to pick some lozenges, I was shocked to hear a loud shouts coming from right across the street. I stood there for a while and what I saw unfold before my eyes broke my heart to the core.
A group of five young girls who looked like they had just cleared high school stood right in the middle of the road. With them were three young men who seemed composed despite the rowdy noise from the girls. I could tell the girls were very drunk and two of them were smoking. They kept harassing the boys to go along with them even though they were reluctant. What I was watching was a clear show of girls in control.
I stood there a while longer watching the group. Vehicles had to make their way around them as they were right in the middle of the road. It was a good thing this was an estate shopping centre otherwise they risked getting run over walking right in the middle of the road. I wondered if their parents knew what they were up to, and even wondered more how they would go home to their families intoxicated as they were. Every once in a while they would hurl insults to passersby and follow it up with loud laughter.
This is not an Isolated happening as over the weekend I saw so many people both young and old passing the hours around tables laden with alcohol. It is now not necessary to drink alcohol in the confines of low light pub as there are now outdoor pubs in the form of tables. Here you find groups of men drinking in the company of ladies who occupy whatever sitting space is available, mostly on the laps of the men. They sit there discussing politics or football as they while away most of the weekend drinking.
In both these scenarios, alcohol is in use in large quantities. It seems nowadays if you are not drinking you are not with it. Alcohol has become the social medium in our society so that if one does not want to be left behind then they need to frequent these alcohol clubs often. It is pathetic watching so many people wasting away their lives in what appears to be a frenzy to outwit each other in intoxication. But what exactly is turning our society into a drinking society?
It is a society gone bad when socialising is done in pubs. I always wonder even more when I see women competing with the men at downing drinks with abandon. Women are not meant to drink. Alcohol makes one loose their focus and we need mothers who are alert to deal with the matters of bringing up a family. So while these women are drinking late into the night who is left with the children, who is mothering them? No wonder we are seeing more and more kids brought up by house helps who may not have the necessary parenting skills. Someone needs to tell ladies that there is nothing cool about sloshing down countless bottles of beer and getting back home late to sleeping children.
Yes life is tough and not getting easier. But when a man or woman chooses to drown their cares with alcohol it does not help anything. No one gets a medal for being an alcoholic and abdicating their roles which is what alcohol does to most. We are seeing more and more men turning into alcoholics day by day and who seem to only work to go out and drink some more. If everyone has turned into an alcoholic, then what is the future of our society? Is there no other means of letting it out except through drinking?
No wonder we are seeing an increase of broken homes. And with that comes broken children who also turn to alcohol to try and cope with life issues. There is also an increase of criminal cases performed under the influence of alcohol. Not to mention unwanted pregnancies that result from the one night stands induced by alcohol consumption. Alcohol brings with it a chain reaction and if left unchecked we could be turning into a drink dependant society. Then woe unto our children!
Alcohol will not solve any problem and that is clear. The effects of alcohol need to be brought out more and more even on national television so that people are reminded what it is they are getting themselves into. Religious leaders too need to call for sobriety and bring forth campaigns on the vice. Sweeping the menace under the rug will not help our society rather we all need to point alternative recreational means of letting off stress. Surely there are more beneficial forums of socialising that do not dent the pocket and cause breakdown of relationships. If we all seek to find them.
A group of five young girls who looked like they had just cleared high school stood right in the middle of the road. With them were three young men who seemed composed despite the rowdy noise from the girls. I could tell the girls were very drunk and two of them were smoking. They kept harassing the boys to go along with them even though they were reluctant. What I was watching was a clear show of girls in control.
I stood there a while longer watching the group. Vehicles had to make their way around them as they were right in the middle of the road. It was a good thing this was an estate shopping centre otherwise they risked getting run over walking right in the middle of the road. I wondered if their parents knew what they were up to, and even wondered more how they would go home to their families intoxicated as they were. Every once in a while they would hurl insults to passersby and follow it up with loud laughter.
This is not an Isolated happening as over the weekend I saw so many people both young and old passing the hours around tables laden with alcohol. It is now not necessary to drink alcohol in the confines of low light pub as there are now outdoor pubs in the form of tables. Here you find groups of men drinking in the company of ladies who occupy whatever sitting space is available, mostly on the laps of the men. They sit there discussing politics or football as they while away most of the weekend drinking.
In both these scenarios, alcohol is in use in large quantities. It seems nowadays if you are not drinking you are not with it. Alcohol has become the social medium in our society so that if one does not want to be left behind then they need to frequent these alcohol clubs often. It is pathetic watching so many people wasting away their lives in what appears to be a frenzy to outwit each other in intoxication. But what exactly is turning our society into a drinking society?
It is a society gone bad when socialising is done in pubs. I always wonder even more when I see women competing with the men at downing drinks with abandon. Women are not meant to drink. Alcohol makes one loose their focus and we need mothers who are alert to deal with the matters of bringing up a family. So while these women are drinking late into the night who is left with the children, who is mothering them? No wonder we are seeing more and more kids brought up by house helps who may not have the necessary parenting skills. Someone needs to tell ladies that there is nothing cool about sloshing down countless bottles of beer and getting back home late to sleeping children.
Yes life is tough and not getting easier. But when a man or woman chooses to drown their cares with alcohol it does not help anything. No one gets a medal for being an alcoholic and abdicating their roles which is what alcohol does to most. We are seeing more and more men turning into alcoholics day by day and who seem to only work to go out and drink some more. If everyone has turned into an alcoholic, then what is the future of our society? Is there no other means of letting it out except through drinking?
No wonder we are seeing an increase of broken homes. And with that comes broken children who also turn to alcohol to try and cope with life issues. There is also an increase of criminal cases performed under the influence of alcohol. Not to mention unwanted pregnancies that result from the one night stands induced by alcohol consumption. Alcohol brings with it a chain reaction and if left unchecked we could be turning into a drink dependant society. Then woe unto our children!
Alcohol will not solve any problem and that is clear. The effects of alcohol need to be brought out more and more even on national television so that people are reminded what it is they are getting themselves into. Religious leaders too need to call for sobriety and bring forth campaigns on the vice. Sweeping the menace under the rug will not help our society rather we all need to point alternative recreational means of letting off stress. Surely there are more beneficial forums of socialising that do not dent the pocket and cause breakdown of relationships. If we all seek to find them.
28 February 2013
SILENT TEARS
She tries to hold the tears in check
but they fall unreserved from her eyes
eyes that have had more
than their share of crying.
Anyone seeing her would not know,
the pain inside her heart
the uncertainity she carries along
unsure of what tomorrow brings.
One might be fooled by her smile
the one that never leaves her face
no matter that the storm rages
it remains fixed for all to see.
But when alone where noone else sees
alone with only God watching
she will let it all out
she will gain relieve in the tears.
Noone told her growing up
of the silent tears she would endure
tears that would come from her heart
understood by noone else.
She has heard of the saying before
strength of a woman they say
despite what might be going on with her
to brave it all and smile.
but they fall unreserved from her eyes
eyes that have had more
than their share of crying.
Anyone seeing her would not know,
the pain inside her heart
the uncertainity she carries along
unsure of what tomorrow brings.
One might be fooled by her smile
the one that never leaves her face
no matter that the storm rages
it remains fixed for all to see.
But when alone where noone else sees
alone with only God watching
she will let it all out
she will gain relieve in the tears.
Noone told her growing up
of the silent tears she would endure
tears that would come from her heart
understood by noone else.
She has heard of the saying before
strength of a woman they say
despite what might be going on with her
to brave it all and smile.
19 February 2013
REGRET
The night held promise of an exciting time for all the students that would be attending the dinner dance that day. It had been a tough first semester for the first year campus students and this was a welcome distraction for them. Most of the afternoon was spent in preparation for the evening.
Joy sat in her campus room wondering if she should go. All her classmates would be at the dance and had kept urging her to join them. Someone had even gone ahead and offered her an outrageously skimpy skirt for the evening. She wrestled with thoughts of remaining locked up in her room but could not imagine being the laughing stock of her class as everyone would be discussing the event the following day. She could however not forget the talk that she had had with her youth pastor on guarding her faith while at campus.
When the Clock struck seven she was all set to go. She decided that she would not be left behind but would go to the dance. Donning a pair of formal pants and a t-shirt she made her way to the hall where everyone was rocking to the music already. She opted to sit farthest from the dance floor and sat there sipping a cold soda as she watched. She could not help but notice how some of her seemingly gullible classmates seemed to have let their guard down and were going at the party full force. Most of them were drunk and went out of their way to identify by trying out different antics on the floor.
Someone offered to dance with Joy but she declined feigning a headache. She knew that she must not compromise her faith and was only here for show. It was not a wasted evening for Joy however. Sitting there at her little corner, she realized the need for her to represent Christ on campus. Watching many students give in to pressure from their colleagues, Joy got an even better understanding of her role in representing her faith to her fellow students.
It was a sober joy that went back to her room that night. Her resolve had been strengthened from her experience that evening. She felt proud of holding strong to her faith and was more determined than ever to stay strong. What Joy did not realize was that she was had just stepped into her ministry on campus. She would try and fill the gap for the missing link while at campus. She did not know yet was the number of students who had watched her quiet composure that evening and could not wait to find out her source of strength to defy pressure.
The following morning was a maze of misery for some students on realizing just how much they had compromised their values that previous evening. Drunkenness and loss of moral values was top on the list of what Joy would be dealing with on campus. Not to mention the guilt.
http://www.faithwriters.com/Boards/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?f=92&t=36504
Joy sat in her campus room wondering if she should go. All her classmates would be at the dance and had kept urging her to join them. Someone had even gone ahead and offered her an outrageously skimpy skirt for the evening. She wrestled with thoughts of remaining locked up in her room but could not imagine being the laughing stock of her class as everyone would be discussing the event the following day. She could however not forget the talk that she had had with her youth pastor on guarding her faith while at campus.
When the Clock struck seven she was all set to go. She decided that she would not be left behind but would go to the dance. Donning a pair of formal pants and a t-shirt she made her way to the hall where everyone was rocking to the music already. She opted to sit farthest from the dance floor and sat there sipping a cold soda as she watched. She could not help but notice how some of her seemingly gullible classmates seemed to have let their guard down and were going at the party full force. Most of them were drunk and went out of their way to identify by trying out different antics on the floor.
Someone offered to dance with Joy but she declined feigning a headache. She knew that she must not compromise her faith and was only here for show. It was not a wasted evening for Joy however. Sitting there at her little corner, she realized the need for her to represent Christ on campus. Watching many students give in to pressure from their colleagues, Joy got an even better understanding of her role in representing her faith to her fellow students.
It was a sober joy that went back to her room that night. Her resolve had been strengthened from her experience that evening. She felt proud of holding strong to her faith and was more determined than ever to stay strong. What Joy did not realize was that she was had just stepped into her ministry on campus. She would try and fill the gap for the missing link while at campus. She did not know yet was the number of students who had watched her quiet composure that evening and could not wait to find out her source of strength to defy pressure.
The following morning was a maze of misery for some students on realizing just how much they had compromised their values that previous evening. Drunkenness and loss of moral values was top on the list of what Joy would be dealing with on campus. Not to mention the guilt.
http://www.faithwriters.com/Boards/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?f=92&t=36504
14 February 2013
Valentine.
I treasure the words from my first ever valentine card. I was in high school and my hubby sent it to me.
It happened when I saw you smile,
Your eyes looked into mine.
I've loved you dearly since that day,
Please be my valentine!
I could recite those words even in my sleep.
It happened when I saw you smile,
Your eyes looked into mine.
I've loved you dearly since that day,
Please be my valentine!
I could recite those words even in my sleep.
22 January 2013
Trust God with it.
We see it from the early Bible times. God asked Abraham to sacrifice his son Isaac in the land of Moriah. It must have been one tall order that one, having to give up his son but Abraham obeyed God. He did not get to sacrifice his son as God provided a ram caught in the thicket by his horns.
Many times God will ask the seemingly impossible of a Christian. It could present as a difficult request for him to make to the person but God knows just what he is doing. It could be that God requires patience with a troublesome child and one might wonder at the wisdom of God in this. Might even be a struggle of a painful illness that God is letting you endure.
At times God allows us to go through terribly trying times so that when he turns around the situation we can learn to depend on him. It delights God when we put our trust in him no matter what might be going on in our lives. To win our trust God takes us through these difficult times so that we can learn to call on him. Then when he gets us out of it we can be forever grateful to him for his ever present help.
Those who have overcome the greatest trials carry with them the most powerful testimonies. It is in those times when no one but God will help the situation that get us constantly crying out to him for help. God is there in the midnight hour when we fall face down in supplication to him. He is there when we have prayed all we can and words fail us. He hears those wordless prayers of a heart too burdened to utter a word. Those falling tears that fall from out eyes never go unnoticed to God.
I can testify to the faithfulness of God in my life. My testimony comes from instances of so much pressure that I could not have borne were it not for his grace. I have seen the provision of God in this life that was nothing but miraculous. I have witnessed his saving power on chariots of Glory come down to save me. I can surely proclaim that I have tasted his goodness in the land.
I want to encourage someone who is in a seemingly helpless situation today. I want to tell you that God is able to turn it around if you will let him. You need to hand over that situation to God. By doing this you will be surrendering your will and asking that his will be done concerning the situation. God loves to do the impossible for us and he will do it for you.
Take heart friend. Take it to the Lord in prayer. He has asked that we take all our burdens to him in prayer. He delights in doing good to his people. He alone understands our pain, our hurt. It is within his power to make it right for us. Purpose to take it all to him for he will make it all good in his time.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sR8rlTIU8_Y
Many times God will ask the seemingly impossible of a Christian. It could present as a difficult request for him to make to the person but God knows just what he is doing. It could be that God requires patience with a troublesome child and one might wonder at the wisdom of God in this. Might even be a struggle of a painful illness that God is letting you endure.
At times God allows us to go through terribly trying times so that when he turns around the situation we can learn to depend on him. It delights God when we put our trust in him no matter what might be going on in our lives. To win our trust God takes us through these difficult times so that we can learn to call on him. Then when he gets us out of it we can be forever grateful to him for his ever present help.
Those who have overcome the greatest trials carry with them the most powerful testimonies. It is in those times when no one but God will help the situation that get us constantly crying out to him for help. God is there in the midnight hour when we fall face down in supplication to him. He is there when we have prayed all we can and words fail us. He hears those wordless prayers of a heart too burdened to utter a word. Those falling tears that fall from out eyes never go unnoticed to God.
I can testify to the faithfulness of God in my life. My testimony comes from instances of so much pressure that I could not have borne were it not for his grace. I have seen the provision of God in this life that was nothing but miraculous. I have witnessed his saving power on chariots of Glory come down to save me. I can surely proclaim that I have tasted his goodness in the land.
I want to encourage someone who is in a seemingly helpless situation today. I want to tell you that God is able to turn it around if you will let him. You need to hand over that situation to God. By doing this you will be surrendering your will and asking that his will be done concerning the situation. God loves to do the impossible for us and he will do it for you.
Take heart friend. Take it to the Lord in prayer. He has asked that we take all our burdens to him in prayer. He delights in doing good to his people. He alone understands our pain, our hurt. It is within his power to make it right for us. Purpose to take it all to him for he will make it all good in his time.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sR8rlTIU8_Y
16 January 2013
02 January 2013
Burden for the hurting.
I enjoyed my Christmas break on the farm with my family. It was a well needed rest for us all and a time spent together reconnecting. I am forever grateful to God for the gift of family. We had many activities that brought together various family members and I can tell of the love we all shared together. The lazy mornings and the late nights, the various escapades are what made it all more exciting for us. All this brought to the fore the importance of family and reaffirmed to me the important things in life.
Just at the close of my break I was taken ill and needed to see a Doctor. I decided to visit a local health clinic in the company of my hubby. When we got to the hospital, we were met by loud wailing. Immediately I got concerned and while at the waiting room I saw her.She stood crying all alone. I decided to ask some ladies what the issue was. It was then that I learnt that she had just lost her new born baby.
I could not believe it. This young lady was all alone unattended and yet she had just lost a child! Even the nurses seemed lost for what to do. I spoke to the two ladies at the waiting room to help console her. Reluctant on what to do at first but they soon joined me. She was in a terrible state. She kept wailing and the questions she asked were endless. It was her firstborn she had just lost, she said.
In between holding her and trying to get her from the room where the baby lay was a tear jerking experience. The two ladies turned out very helpful and together we shared her pain. I realised that we all have a huge capacity of caring but most of the time we do not utilise it. Slowly the crying came down and she started talking to us.
It eventually turned out that she had lost the baby on the way to hospital thus there was nothing the Doctors could have done. But I still feel that they might have cared for her in a better way. It hurt me so much hearing her wailing and yet knowing that all I could do was be there for her.
Only when her folks came and together they left to take the baby to the morgue did I remember my pain. Grief counselling is essential for anyone that suffers lose. In most hospitals there is not enough of this offered and patients are left to deal with the pain on their own or with relatives. I believe that we can do better in caring for the hurting among us.
It is the capacity to care for each other that makes us human. Life is indeed more bearable to us if we make time for each other and if we realise the importance of being there when we are needed. For this, is something that even money cannot buy. Compassion.
Just at the close of my break I was taken ill and needed to see a Doctor. I decided to visit a local health clinic in the company of my hubby. When we got to the hospital, we were met by loud wailing. Immediately I got concerned and while at the waiting room I saw her.She stood crying all alone. I decided to ask some ladies what the issue was. It was then that I learnt that she had just lost her new born baby.
I could not believe it. This young lady was all alone unattended and yet she had just lost a child! Even the nurses seemed lost for what to do. I spoke to the two ladies at the waiting room to help console her. Reluctant on what to do at first but they soon joined me. She was in a terrible state. She kept wailing and the questions she asked were endless. It was her firstborn she had just lost, she said.
In between holding her and trying to get her from the room where the baby lay was a tear jerking experience. The two ladies turned out very helpful and together we shared her pain. I realised that we all have a huge capacity of caring but most of the time we do not utilise it. Slowly the crying came down and she started talking to us.
It eventually turned out that she had lost the baby on the way to hospital thus there was nothing the Doctors could have done. But I still feel that they might have cared for her in a better way. It hurt me so much hearing her wailing and yet knowing that all I could do was be there for her.
Only when her folks came and together they left to take the baby to the morgue did I remember my pain. Grief counselling is essential for anyone that suffers lose. In most hospitals there is not enough of this offered and patients are left to deal with the pain on their own or with relatives. I believe that we can do better in caring for the hurting among us.
It is the capacity to care for each other that makes us human. Life is indeed more bearable to us if we make time for each other and if we realise the importance of being there when we are needed. For this, is something that even money cannot buy. Compassion.
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