27 February 2014

Real sex.

I was listening to a local radio station this morning discussing a topic that I have held back on for quite a while and found myself nodding all the way. It was about the effects that pornography has on the users and also the truth about the emotional side of sex.
Having observed the younger generation I am still in shock at what they are missing out in the area of relationships and sex. For them, it has become sort of a `status quo' kind of thing to sleep with anyone who cares to notice. What we see thus is a generation of people who do all they can to look attractive and sexually appealing on the outside while completely disregarding the emotional part of it.
It is no longer necessary to woo a girl, just drop a few lame sexy lines and you got yourself a lay. The girls do not seem to care that there is often no emotional attachment and seem to view anyone who asks for a roll in the hay as a one sent from heaven to rescue them.
What this has led to is a generation of young people and those young at heart, who do not require a good reason to hop into bed with a guy. There is no way you will meet someone for a short time and claim to know them well enough, complete with their sexual history.
Much of the crazed sex escapades stem from the stuff that people are watching on any screen available. Pity that pornography is available to any (even school kids) and it is no wonder that we are seeing a generation, both young and old, of people who have perverted the very act meant for commitment and sanctity to something piteously cheap.
Pornography doubtless does not add any value to one except to create an unnecessarily insensitive atmosphere for sex. Anyone who is (or hopes to one day be) in a loving relationship should steer away of anything that does not afford the partner an equal amount of pleasure. It is selfish and immoral (and even inhuman) to take your fill as your partner suffers pain and humiliation in your hands.Much like animals that do not care about how their partner feels since it is just copulation to them.
It is evident from the breakdown in marriages and relationships that the element of selfishness has quickly crept in sex too. Since only the physical need is met the ladies are let wondering what happened to the bonding that they expect therein. There is bound to be trouble when one partner feels like he/she is always on the giving and never the receiving end.
And so anyone wishing to engage in the act should use the human approach to it and leave the wild acts and the unpleasant language to the beasts. Girls remember the soft words spoken to them by a love crazed man years later. And men rarely take some wild crazed girl to the altar since that is a recipe for disaster.
God did not make sex as a tool of commerce nor as a way of fulfillment for one partner only. He made it so that two people who care deeply about another can express their love in the most intimate and rewarding way possible without shame and rebuke. All other adaptations of sex are mere fakes that will eventually come tumbling down leaving  behind broken hearts and at times irreversible consequences. 

06 February 2014

A few good people

Recently, I had an encounter that goes to prove that there are still good people in the world. I got an experience that totally blew me off my mind.
My girl was travelling to the South Coast and all plans were in place.Having left Nairobi with the 9:30 am coastair, she was meant to be in Mombasa at around 5:00 pm that evening and plans had been made to have someone awaiting her on the other end. However there was some delay in Mariakani which saw her get to Mombasa after 6:00 pm. 
Not being very familiar with the town and with luggage in tow, she needed help to get to cross over the ferry so that she could get to Ukunda. 
Now the person that was supposed to be making the arrangements did a shoddy job at it and by the time the girl was getting to Mombasa had already given up on her and left. So there she was, calling me to inform me that the one who was supposed to pick her up was off net. Someone sent a cab to ferry her over so that she could be able to catch transport to Ukunda before it got too late.
All this time, I was constantly on phone(the mother I am) checking on her location every so often. Soon she called me to confirm that she was safely in a matatu on her way to Ukunda. The next problem was that the person who was supposed to have met her was meant to have booked her a place for the night. Now we were in a worse dilemma than before.
On reaching Ukunda, she called me up inquiring where she was meant to go to from there.The girl who was supposed to have made those arrangements had instead decided that she spend the night at a friend of hers for the night.
Since I did not know her well, I was uneasy with that arrangement and I got thinking fast. 
I thought of anyone I would know that side of Coast and that is when a twitter buddy of mine came to mind. I knew that he was quite familiar with coast and even if not able to save the situation himself would offer pointers anyway. And so I hit him up on twitter and explained the situation to him. He responded pretty fast and within no time had called up a lady friend of his who was willing to go pick up my girl for the night. 
I could trust him since we chatted often on twitter and anyway a mother can always tell who to trust. Let's just say that the situation was solved pretty fast and soon my girl was sleeping off fatigue in a warm bed at the kindly ladies house. 
This particular episode did two things to me. It went to affirm to me that there are still good people in the world, people who go out of their way to do good with no strings attached. The lady touched me so much, being ready to go out at that time of the night to pick up someone she had not met before to take her in to her house.
I may not be able to thank my twitter buddy enough for what he did that day and even  the lady who acted in all humanity to save a situation. But such people go a long way in proving to humanity that with just a little goodness the life of another can be impacted in a positive way. 
This post is a tribute to the two, for words cannot express my gratitude to you both. Thanks @njooro for all that you did that day and to the wonderful lady Gee, May God bless you abundantly. Anyone in need of direction while at the coast can hit my friend up and he will link you up with a good hotel or home stay.He is trustworthy and brilliant, I would know. You can reach him at @njooro or travelguru.co.ke